"The second miscarriage was especially heavy for me. With the echo they found out that both of the two embryo's were not vital anymore. A couple of days after the echo, I was very uneasy and felt like I wanted to get rid of them as soon as possible. There was this weird feeling of being 'dirty' inside. The expelling happened naturally in about a week. But then it became very hard physically. I spend probably one of the worst nights of my life with the cramps and loss of blood.

I was totally exhausted. For a few days I was totally knocked out and was almost motionless because of the pain. I was just laying on the couch with a pillow under my belly and my body that could barely react.

When my body started to feel better again, I had the feeling of being wrong, for not being able to carry a child in my body."